nothing better to do

wow it's been ages since i've posted here.
don't think anyone actually comes here to check for an update or whatsoever anyway.
the 06 blog is defunct too. the 3 of us have been too 'busy' to update, haha.

well alot has change in the past year or so. life has changed quite drastically for me and my 2 best friends. or maybe just me. we're all heading in different directions in life for different things. tho some things are common. for one thing our path of friendship still remains the same. no matter what we've been through, the 3 of us, it still stays the same, haha.

on a lonely boring wednesday night, even tho i've had offers to go clubbing, i've decided to stick at home and drink. to do the thing i do best and do it good, drink. i'm an alcholic of sorts i guess. i can live without alcohol like i can do so without cigarettes or unhealthy food. but it truly is something i enjoy like good food, hah.

lately i posted a quiz on Facebook and most of my friends guessed i'd "eat drink and be merry" if i had the time and money". when questioned by them why that was not my answer i told them straight that "i'd do that even if i didnt have the money."

if there be any grammer or spelling mistakes please excuse me, i'm half way through my "drink till i forget tonight" quest. this is proving an expensive journey, i've killed the goose and proceeding to kill pang's bottle of bacardi limon. it's cool, i told him i'd make it up to him. this shit is good. what i lack is a nice cigar or come cigarettes.

we all change. certain things or just for no reason at all humans change. for better or worse till death do us part. we change. we are but human. i've been alot of things and alot not. the days still go by either for better or worse. i fell in love with someone i should not and well guess what? it turned out as everyone expected. a tragedy of sorts. right...

when you feel down what do you do? make yourself happy. whats wrong with "forcing yourself to be happy"? it's just another form of making yourself happy no? you want 'truly happy'? sorry that shit doesnt exist. you make do with what you have... and sometimes you have no choice but to make do with what you had.

time doesn't heal the wound, even if it does it still leaves a scar there. don't be taken in by the time heals all wounds lie. it doesn't exist. you get a scar, big or small is up to you or whatsoever caused the scar.

i apologize right now to everyone and anyone reading this blog. i'm rambling on and on about stuff which dont really matter. what does matter in life? money so you can buy a huge house and live a rich and b-e-a-u-tiful life. fat? money can give you lipo! partnerless? money can buy you a b-e-a-u-tiful partner! who cares about anything else anyway. i admit the family i was born into is not poor, but not god damn rich either. my parents showed me love when i was younger through the message that money is important. anything i did right would be rewarded through money or a monetary incentive of sorts. they didnt ask me how my school work was, they didnt ask me was it cos of any problems i faced at school or whatsoever. why the hell would they ask if they knew that all they needed to do was dangle a carrot infront of this mule? why whould they care if their son drank himself to sleep every night for a year, didn't give a fuck about anything he did in poly cos of a girl. or why their son goes to a "dead-end-job" everyday and feel like crap when he could do so much more with his life? it's cos they still think money is everything. it's important but for god or whatever's sake it ain't that bloody imporant. call me old fashioned or whatever but what the fuck happend to love? apparently it went to jump off some unknown cliff along the aegean sea. yes go ahead and google where the aegean sea is.

when you feel like there is nothing left in this world left to fight for, or you just feel like giving up on everything. dont. there are still people worth fighting for, there are still people who make this world worth it. it just depends on how much you weigh their worth, everyone has a different scale. some people have rigged scales. but everyone judges and decides. most people just become the judge, jury but not the executioner.

right now my eyes are somewhat closing while i still sit at the desk typing my final few words to try close this post successfully without smashing my head over the keyboard wondering what i should type.

while typing the above sentence i think i have decided to leave you with a "follow your heart, not your mind, because your mind thinks while your heart just nudges you towards your desires"

sigh, it is time for me to publish and sign out and allow everone to read my stupid drunked post about stupidity. maybe half a bottle or so more and i'm probably "gone" too.

cheers to anyone and everyone who has read this post. kinda surpising. good luck and good life to all. i seriously gotta put an end to everything soon.

Learn

People learn and change.
Always believe that no one is born the way he or she is.
That circumstances and the environment can change.
People change with them.

When the world around you changes,
change with it.
Or you would be the one left behind.
No one likes to be left behind.

Learn to adapt and make the best of things.
Learn to be happy.
Learn to make people around you happy.
Learn to or you won't be happy.

Everything starts with yourself.
If you dont want to learn, no one will teach you.
If you do want to learn, be happy someone taught you.
If not, observe and learn the hard or easy way.

The choice is always yours.
Never believe that when life gives you something you have to take it.
No one can force you to do something you do no want to.
It is all a matter of choice and perception.

Perceive the good and you shall be happy.
Perceive the bad and you shall be sad.
'Hope is a bonus.' people say,
But if you don't try, it would be dumb luck.

Learn to see.
Learn to hear.
Learn to feel.
Learn to watch Monkeys on Rainbows.

Time

It's been a year.
I'm still here.
Time will tell.
We all know well.

Moving here and there.
All just stop and stare.
Moving around around.
All sleep safe and sound.

It heals all wounds i hear.
Truly? Are you sure?
It turns black to grey.
That i know it may.

I lost my muse.
Crap.
Just wanted to rhyme something.
Happens once in awhile when i'm bored and unhappy or whatever.
Some people just don't understand i guess.
Or maybe i don't understand...
Time will tell.
All i can do is wait.
I still do hope.
Hope for the better.
I still do dream.
Dream of the future.
I still do see.
See... Erm... Hey look! Monkeys on Rainbows!

A normal post?

So bored. It's Monday and back to work after only 1 day of rest. Worse still is that Ah Yeo is going back to reservice this week. So we'd be left with Rahim as the only salesman downstairs. And well as usual it's back to doing boring and stuff which i find boring.

Well my friend just came back from Hong Kong this weekend and well, i guess different people as usual have different perspective. I found Hong Kong to be just an average place to visit and the only good thing was that it was a food paradise. My friend however found the food lousy. At least i'm glad she's back from Hong Kong. Yes my friend is a female.

Speaking about females, i find it quite disturbing how people come up with perceptions of me. Colleagues are 'shocked' that i'm single. Barber thinks i'm like 18 and still studying. Almost everyone thinks i'm sane. Oh yeah, i got my hair cut today, tad bit short on the sides.

Such a boring weekend, gone, just like that. Saturday work, Sunday slack, back to Monday and work. So many things to say, so lazy to type.

Whats the point? A normal post? Too lazy. No Muse. This is the time and point of every week where i'm at my most depressing. Well most of the time it is. Depends.
Oh and yeah, hey look... Monkeys on Rainbows. Yawn.

About the way we live

Do you watch TV?
Majority of the human race does i guess.
I say don't.
Don't let your kids watch it.
Don't watch TV.
It corrupts and destroys lives.
Gives you a false images of what life is like.
I watch TV.


Do you go to work for 10 hours a day, spend one and half hours traveling to and from work, an hour for breakfast and dinner, sleep 7 hours and then only have 4 and a half hours free time, which is around 1/5 of a day to do what you want?

Do you go to work and work under a boss who either can't make up his mind or gives you so much stuff to work with that you sometimes wonder why you are working in that company with no benefits and an average pay?

Do you eat your dinner after 8pm which would actually cause you to gain weight due to the drop in metabolism rate?

Lack of sleep?

You see your dreams, you try to work towards them, maybe you're not working hard enough, but no matter how hard you try, you don't seem to be getting near to your dreams nor see any hope of fulfilling them.

Unhealthy lifestyle and no will power to change?

Don't do enough of what you like? For example wakeboarding?

Maybe only i think my life sucks. Or maybe i just don't have what it takes to change it with my will power or whatever it takes to change?
No matter what... Hey look! Monkeys on Rainbows!

Hope?

It is a fickle thing.
What for and why?
This thing which keeps us alive.
Without it what would we be?

Yet with it comes failure.
And more most despair.
Are we weak for bowing to despair?
Sometimes it is what we do.

Hope is what we cling to against our daily weary and tired jobs, our boring lives or whatever we rebel against. Is it not? Hope for a better day? More money? What do we truly need or truly want? Should we think about it and find a dream? What? Why? When in the end it doesn't even matter. I'm being depressing and rambling. It does me no good to think. Maybe of more happy thoughts and more productive ones will do me good.

But hey... Look! Monkeys on Rainbows!

Wake.

Wake.
Sun.

Feel.
Feed.
Adrenaline.
Wake.
Ache.
Burn.

Sleep.